Monday, August 16, 2010

Atlantean Jokes

In 2002, Richard Wiseman of the University of Hertfordshire carried out research to find the world's funniest joke. I like the runner-up joke; the eventual winner sounds too much like modern economic policy. So here is one of my favourite jokes:

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson go on a camping trip, and after finishing their dinner they retire for the night, and go to sleep. Some hours later, Holmes wakes up and nudges his faithful friend.

"Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see."

"I see millions and millions of stars, Holmes" exclaims Watson.

"And what do you deduce from that?"

Watson ponders for a minute. "Well, astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo. Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three. Meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. Theologically, I can see that God is all powerful, and that we are a small and insignificant part of the universe. What does it tell you, Holmes?"

"Watson, you idiot!" he exclaims, "Somebody's stolen our tent!"


The other night, I was watching a wonderful display, part of which was described as a narrative tapestry of the history of Atlantis. I must have dozed off, because I thought I heard voices in the darkness singing words that were never sung in that display.

There are five holes appearing
Up in our tapestry
We can only speak of them
Where nobody can see

Elitism and censorship
And meritocracy
A place not for the poor and weak
A faux democracy

There were more verses, but I dismissed all these dark voices and enjoyed the funny monster and the computer graphics before going off for a cheese sandwich.



Blogger Jont said...

I would like to see more of such pseudo-Atlantean songs. Makes my heart swell with pride when I read such truthful mockery.

Plus, it pretty much secures your place in the Bad Poets' Society.

Tuesday, August 17, 2010 4:15:00 am  

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